I was at a party in my 20's. A few of us were outside, near the fire, and a women (I "knew" only because she was my boyfriends roommate, and was super amazing in a million ways) turned to me and said, "Well, Chrissy, it's because you are a dabbler." At the time, I had NO IDEA if this was, according to her, good or bad. Making this comment, I had no idea what her intentions were. This comment coupled with the fact that she is super great and my boyfriends roommate, I didn't feel so great about being called a "dabbler." In retrospect, I am pretty sure she didn't mean any offense, since whatever it is that I am, I like it. Maybe it would just be nice to have a prettier word. Recently, I have come to realize, it's projects I like. It's stagnation I don't like. I have no interest in mastering anything. Rather, there is just enough time to throw myself into a few things. I will always be envious of those who are able to commit to their craft for a lifetime. I'm okay with that. At 30 whatever, I have learned this is not for me. What a liberating feeling- to stop comparing. I have written over 40 folk songs, but I don't really sing well, and don't play an instrument. But, I love my songs. That's it.
See, I transitioned to the handmade craft from photography (and photography from teaching). I am pretty sure I will never stop taking photographs, and looking at thousands of photographs weekly, and I am pretty confident I will never "really" stop teaching either. Though, when totally engrossed in my fine art AND my family business photography, I was very burdened by the concept of originality. It was very consuming. I just kept honing in on the wrong things, and ultimately felt my creativity wither, slowly.
Any beginner sewer can make a headband. Anyone can make what I now make. But I'm in there somewhere. This nuance I love. (Perhaps this taps into my love for cover songs). I don't really care about originality anymore. It's ok we sound, create, and look like each other. That's what connects us, ultimately.
And, there was also a strong desire to work with my hands again. OUR HANDS.
Maybe pet grooming is next!
What is quite comforting and inspiring about all this, is that I have grown up, while simultaneously fostering and feeding what makes me feel alive. It's to make. I love to make things.
This doesn't make me special. This makes me connected, and part of that something bigger than myself, amorphous and huge. But it's up to us to fill it with something good. That's Wyldlu.
hey. so, here is my new site.